Why Hater's Hate: Moving Past the Anger

Hate. For most people this word conjures up more images and memories than perhaps any other. The bully who made you miserable as a child; a friend you once trusted; an ex lover, a parent, a sibling…maybe even yourself. Hate comes from anger, and anger from the instinct to protect ourselves from pain. In short, anger and hate originate from a primitive defense rooted in the brains need to automatically protect itself from perceived threats. When it comes down to it, feeling angry and hateful is easier and safer than feeling sadness, betrayal, disappointment, fear, grief or loss.

Fixing this is simple, but it is not easy. It takes a willingness to recognize and change negative thoughts and behavior patterns, and the ability to identify and work through the experiences that caused the hate and anger so you can let it go. Remember that hate is easy, but forgiveness is hard. It is up to you to decide to forgive and move on to being a healthier, happier you.

                                                             

When you are ready to begin to the healing, we can help. North Valley Anger Management Consultants offers evening and weekend classes to help you over come the anger and hate. For more information, or a free consultation, please visit our website at www.nvamc.com or call us at 1-888-992-6479 today. Anger hurts, we can help stop the hurt and begin the healing.

                                 

                                                      

Overcoming Anger Addiction

Anger is an emotion we are all very familiar with. Despite being a universal emotion of the human condition, anger is generally viewed in a negative way and most people love to hate it. However, anger, over time, can become an addictive rollercoaster trapping you in toxic thoughts, patterns and behaviors. In short, people can become addicted to anger, or rather the emotional response know as anger.

So what causes people to become additcted to anger? Well, anger triggers the primal, subconscious, part of your brain designed for survival and fight or flight responses. When it is triggered, waves of chemicals ,such as dopamine and adrenaline, flood your system giving you a quick false sense of feeling good. Your body then subconsciously begins to settle into this comfortable and familiar routine of getting angry to protect itself and gain that quick feel good.

So just what can we do about all this? There are many things we can do to solve this problem. The first and most important thing we can do is learn to recognize just when we are about to go into this state of toxic, feel good anger, and respond to it with ways to move away from this course of thought. Remember that by design your subconscious is not capable of rational thinking, rather it relies on messages and beliefs that were absorbed during  formative childhood years. This means that it is up to you to consciously recognize this, and decide to change it.

 Another thing we can do is to form other patterns of behavior that give us a feel good response, without being harmful to our mental and physical well being.This is called building resiliency through the creation postive personal habits. The important thing to remember is that no one is powerless over their emotions, and we all have the capacity for positive growth and change; we just have to learn to accept it. Truly knowing yourself is scary, and can be difficult, but with dedication and patience anyone can do it.   

For information, or a free consultation, please call us at 1-888-992-6479, or visit our website at www.nvamc.com.