How To Spot a Bully In Your Child's Life

Would you know if your child was being bullied? Often bullying goes unreported and undetected, yet the damage is still done and can have life altering effects. In 2009,  Finkelhor, Turner, Ormrod,&Hamby conducted a national study of United States school children, ages 2-17, and identified 29.5 percent of the youth surveyed had experienced emotional bullying, and 21.6 percent had experienced physical bullying. Knowing the signs and getting immediate assistance to stop the bullying and provide emotional support can make all the difference in the life of child. The following are warning signs often demonstrated by children being bullied:

Comes home with torn, damaged, or missing pieces of clothing, books, or other belongs

Has unexplained cuts, bruises, scratches

Has few, if any friends, with whom they spend time

Seems afraid of going to school, walking to and from school, riding the bus, or taking part in organized activities with peers

Takes a long, illogical, route to school

Has lost interest in, or suddenly begins to do poorly at school

Appears sad, moody, teary, or depressed when they come home from school

Complains of frequent headaches, stomachaches, or other physical symptoms

Has trouble sleeping or has frequent bad dreams

Demonstrates a loss of appetite

Appears anxious and suffers from low self esteem

Learning how to recognize the symptoms may save a life. Know the signs and stop bullying today!
For more information please visit www.cde.ca.gov/ls/ss/se/bullyres.asp

The "Anger Trap"

Avoiding the "Anger Trap" is an important skill to have in your communication tool box, and is one that is often over looked. Navigating the slippery slope of interpersonal relations is never easy, but with a little help you will be stirring the communication course like a pro.
 An "Anger Trap" is the emotional mine field of any interaction that involves one party being denied something that they want. Yes, this happens all the time, all over the world, in ever aspect of life from the home to the cooperate board room. The result of getting caught in one of these traps, most especially in the business world, can often be a fast trip to anger management class. So what is the infamous trap, and how do you avoid it? An "Anger Trap" is sprung when the party being denied is able to hook the denier into justifying the denial and in so doing begins to exploit the deniers guilt. At this point, the denier becomes angry in response to the emotions associated with the guilt, and thus a successful 'anger trap' has been sprung. Avoiding the trap then becomes a matter of the denier being able to establish clear boundaries and effectively managing their communication of the denial. In short, the denier must avoid engaging in explanations by using clear, concise commands coupled with immediate disengagement from the conversation. This does not mean forgoing politeness, but it does mean remaining in control of the conversation. For more information about our services including anger management, interpersonal communication, stress management, avoiding the "Anger Trap", emotional intelligence, etc., please visit our website at www.nvamc.com or call 888-992-6479.